The Main Provision of Islamic Families

By: Taufiqurrahman, Journalist of MINA

Allah Ta’ala says:

يَٰٓأَيُّهَا ​​ٱلنَّاسُ ٱتَّقُوا۟ رَبَّكُمُ ٱلَّذِى خَلَقَكُم مِّن نَّفْسٍ وَٰحِدَةٍ وَخَلَقَ مِنْهَا زَوْجَهَا وَبَثَّ مِنْهُمَا رِجَالًا كَثِيرًا وَنِسَآءً ۚ وَٱتَّقُوا۟ ٱللَّهَ ٱلَّذِى تَسَآءَلُونَ بِهِۦ وَٱلْأَرْحَامَ ۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ كَانَ عَلَيْكُمْ رَقِيبًا

“O people, fear your Lord, who created you from a single soul, and from him Allah created his wife; and from both of them God gave birth to many men and women. And fear Allah with (using) His name you ask one another, and (maintain) friendly relations. Verily, Allah is always guarding and watching over you.” (An Nisa: 1)

Through the verse above Allah reminds us of the strong relationship between piety to Him and social life. Our social life begins with the relationship between Adam and Eve. Then from the two of them He multiplied mankind until now. They interact with each other to meet their needs. With that they maintain harmonious social relations. And among the most important relationships to maintain is kinship.

All of this happens by the power of Allah Ta’ala who creates humans, breeds them, fulfills all their needs and maintains social relations between them. Thus we realize our strong dependence on Him in living life in the world. And we will not succeed in realizing harmonious social relations without piety to Him. And among the social relations that are our main concern is our relationship with our partners.

When interpreting the above verse, Imam Ibn Kathir in his Book of Tafsir, quoted an authentic hadith narrated by Imam Bukhari and Muslim from Abi Hurairah, in which the Prophet sallallaahu’alaihi wa sallam said:

“اسْتَوْصُوا بِالنِّسَاءِ، فَإِنَّ المَرْأَةَ خُلِقَتْ مِنْ ضِلَعٍ، وَإِنَّ أَعْوَجَ شَيْءٍ فِي الضِّلَعِ أَعْلاَهُ، فَإِنْ ذَهَبْتَ تُقِيمُهُ كَسَرْتَهُ، وَإِنْ تَرَكْتَهُ لَمْ يَزَلْ أَعْوَجَ، فَاسْتَوْصُوا بِالنِّسَاءِ”

“Be bequeathed (in kindness) to women, for women were created from a rib, and the most crooked of a rib is its base. If you try to straighten those crooked ribs, they can break. But if you let it then he will remain crooked. For that advise the women “. (Narrated by Bukhari and Muslim)

Ibn Hajar al Asqalani commented on the hadith

قِيلَ فِيهِ إِشَارَةٌ إِلَى أَنَّ حَوَّاءَ خُلِقَتْ مِنْ ضِلَعِ آدَمَ الْأَيْسَرِ وَقِيلَ من ضلعه الْقصير أخرجه بن إِسْحَاقَ…

Meaning: “It is stated that the hadith above is a sign that Eve was created from Adam’s left rib, and some say a short rib, as recorded by Ibn Ishaq … (Ibnu Hajar al Asqalani. Fathul Bari Syarah Shahih al Bukhari. Beirut-Darul Ma’rifah juz 6 p.368)

Both literally and figuratively, the information above expresses how close we are to our partners. The Apostle links the commandment of advice to the nature of our relationship with a partner. Just as Allah relates the command of taqwa to the nature of our relationship with a partner.

That means the relationship that occurs between us and our partner is not an ordinary human relationship. For this reason, in another verse, Allah calls our relationship with a partner as ‘mitsaqan ghalidhan’:

{ وَكَيْفَ تَأْخُذُونَهُۥ وَقَدْ أَفْضَىٰ بَعْضُكُمْ إِلَىٰ بَعْضٍ وَأَخَذْنَ مِنكُم مِّيَث

“How are you going to take it back, even though some of you have been associating (mixed) with others as husband and wife. And they (your wives) have taken from you a strong agreement.” (An Nisa: 21)

On the basis of the marriage contract, which Allah calls the mitsaqan ghalidan, we make it lawful for ourselves and our partners before to touch and stare at it for a long time is forbidden for us. With mitsaq ghalida, we share with our partners, pay attention to each other, grow each other and sacrifice for each other.

In fact, starting from mitsaqan ghalizan, we build a bigger family, in which various friendship relationships occur. There are rights and obligations that are prioritized to be fulfilled in it first compared to rights and obligations to non-relatives.

Therefore, we then understand that there is a great spirit of accountability both as a husband, wife, father, mother, child, brother or relative, even fellow Muslims and fellow human beings. That spirit is born from those of us who are born through marriage and continue to grow when we get married and live a household life.

This spirit of accountability becomes the energy that drives us to continue to develop ourselves, to give, to devote attention to, to nurture relationships and to grow our partners, our children and our families.

We need a large source of energy to live it. And the source of that energy is none other than piety to Allah Ta’ala. Because to Him we hope that all forms of accountability will lead us, our families and relatives and all loved ones around us to meet, gather in heaven before Allah Ta’ala.

{ٱدْخُلُوا۟ ٱلْجَنَّةَ أَنتُمْ وَأَزْوَٰجُكُمْ تُحْبَرُونَ}

“Enter you into heaven, you and your wives will be rejoiced.” (Az Zukhruf: 70).

May Allah Ta’ala create peace, love and affection between us and He bestows upon us the happiness of life, not only in this world but also in the Hereafter. (T/RE1)

Mi’raj News Agency (MINA)